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Mermaids “talk” via whale-like humming. Unlike humans who rely on pre-defined words for expression, mermaids can directly convey and understand emotions and ideas based on tone.

Human: Hey bitch
Mermaid, analyzing: [playful tone, possibly a greeting…!]
Mermaid: Bitch!!! Bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Due to mermaids communicating based solely on tone, they’re able to not only learn human languages quickly, but assess a human’s true character the moment they speak. 

It’s no coincidence that throughout history, rowdy sailors and pirates have been drowned by mermaids.

Pirate: Hello, darling 🙂
Mermaid, analyzing tone: [Dishonest. Condescending. Bad breath.]
Mermaid, about to sink the ship: Hello to you too 😉

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This would be hell if there were autistic mermaids or an autistic person interacted with one

We’re speculating about autistic mermaids. What a time to be alive.

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