Don’t trust morning you. Morning you is a dick. Morning you would sell your loved ones if it got them 5 minutes of extra sleep

maybe morning me wouldn’t be such a dick if that flaky bitch evening me had gone to bed instead of tumblring til butts oclock int he morning

Well evening me might have fallen asleep at a reasonable hour if that dumbass afternoon me hadn’t lain down for a “little nap” that lasted four hours.


i’ll never understand people who wake up and immediately begin talking because i need to go through a 2 hour period of wanting to kill a man before i’m ready for human interaction




Being up at 4-5 am is like loading in a level but the textures haven’t loaded all the way through yet.

i like this text post a lot because it’s a comparison between two extremely different styles of humor despite it, effectively, being the same joke