hogwartshousefriends:

skipuru:

hogwartshousefriends:

“Gotta get me one of those black bath bombs so I can dramatically emerge from the water like I’m rising from the pits of hell. You know, self care.”

-Slytherin

Ravenclaw: But no one will see it happen…

Slytherin: Does someone have to?

Solution.

Step 1: Buy a bunch of the black bath bombs.

Step 2: Invite your friends over for a pool party.

Step 3: Before they arrive throw in the bath bombs and submerge yourself.

Step 4: Emerge like the hell being that you truly are upon their arrival.

Step 5: Get new friends because you’ve probably scared them off.

Step 6: Repeat steps 1-5 until you have surrounded yourself with a group of friends who appreciate your dramatic entrances.

slytherins-slither:

Slytherin: Okay google, how do I get revenge on those who have forsaken me?

Google: The best revenge is letting go and living well.

Slytherin:

Slytherin: Bing, how do I get–

slytherins: *have no role models. i mean no role models. regulus black is seen as a death eater, snape is an abusive bastard, draco isn’t given redemption, andromeda is hardly mentioned. no role models*
slytherins: *work hard all year, about to win, and still lose the house cup*
slytherin first years: *belittled when sorted. they’re eleven years old*
slytherins: *always suspected, undermined, and pitted against the rest of the school*
slytherins: *booed at every Quidditch match*
slytherins: *excluded from the only redemption they can have- fighting in the battle and dumbledore’s army*
slytherins: *expected to fight in the battle anyways and treated like fucking terrorists when they choose not to for fear that they’ll be fighting their parents, friends, and family*
slytherins: *automatically taken to mean death eater*
slytherins: *always pitted against the rest of the school and portrayed as terrible people even though they face discrimination and harassment*
Gryffindors: WHY ARE ALL THE SLYTHERINS MEAN TO US? WE’RE SO NICE!! *uwu*

Hufflepuff: …So what’s it like dating Slytherin?
Gryffindor: Once, I asked them for a water while they were pissed at me, and they brought me a glass full of ice and said “wait.”

harrypotterconfessions:

I think Voldemort wasn’t very Slytherin. A true Slytherin would have become the Minister of Magic, consolidated his power, and then changed the world to suit his beliefs. what Voldemort did -fighting outright- was totally a Gryffindor move.