When people are obviously in a lot of pain, responding with “Fuck you, you shouldn’t be suffering,” is not going to solve anything for anyone, regardless of how frivolous the problem seems to you.
Which isn’t to say that people never get upset about genuinely frivolous problems, or that they shouldn’t be encouraged to take healthier attitudes in such a situation, or that their suffering creates an obligation on anyone else’s part to do anything about it. But pretending that their pain isn’t real or declaring them to be bad people for feeling it isn’t helpful.
apprehensive shark would like 2 remind u of a thing
You know what. I gotta get this off my chest. This concerns rp.
People often wonder why I choose to advocate and play villains, antagonists, and antiheroes. The Neutrals, Neutral and Lawful Evils, and Chaotic Neutrals. Rather than playing the characters who are Lawful Goods like myself, who are basically nice people, people I feel more of a natural kinship with. People it’s EASY to love.
Why do I choose the hard path, and play the villain? Why do I try to plausibly save the villain in my chosen narratives?
I do it because, both as a Christian and as a human being who strives to lead a moral life, I feel we have an ethical responsibility to have compassion. Not just people who are already on the right track, and strong, and adjusted. Also people who fuck up, people who suffer because of the mistakes they make. People who are deeply flawed but still have a sliver of hope of redemption.
I do it because I believe that if someone is genuinely contrite, you forgive them, you treat them with dignity and compassion, even if you never CONDONE the awful things they’ve done.
I do it because if I ever made a monumental mistake and was sorry, I’d hope someone would see the potential in my broken soul and forgive me, and give me another chance.
I do it because what’s the point in being alive otherwise, if we only include and exalt those who already have a fighting chance, without our mediation and advocacy?
I do it because in my heart I believe it is the right thing to do. Not the easy thing. It’s emotionally draining, disappointing, lonely, and agonizing. But it IS the RIGHT thing to do.
Forgiving without condoning is the right thing to do.
It’s easy to stand on a pedestal and judge someone who’s done something wrong. It’s easy to hide behind the sanctimony of “I would never do what YOU did.” Maybe you wouldn’t, protagonistic character. Maybe you ARE a better person. No one is contesting that. But neither you, my dear protagonist, my dear “hero,” nor anyone else, is perfect. Neither you nor anyone else SHOULD condemn a person to being “past saving” just because you happen to have a cleaner record or be in a better and stabler place than the person you so righteously scorn.
Being a better person doesn’t give you carte blanche to treat someone else like shit. A record of grievances against someone else doesn’t give you carte blanche to treat someone else like shit. Because guess what? Once you do, your heroism doesn’t mean a god damned thing.
And let’s not even go INTO how villains often stand for NECESSARY social subversion against the hypocrisies that the status quo often indoctrinates. Let’s not even go INTO how villains quite usefully call bullshit in established institutions, and are often far more progressive than the so-called “heroes.” Cause I could do a whole other rant on that.
Go ahead, call me an apologist. I dare you.
is bullshit advice.
My bigness is not determined by my capacity to quietly absorb bullying, degradation, or abuse.